


Home At Last

by Sarina_Hawke_Theirin



Series: Melody Hawke [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-07
Updated: 2014-06-07
Packaged: 2018-02-03 19:44:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1755485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sarina_Hawke_Theirin/pseuds/Sarina_Hawke_Theirin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After fleeing for their lives from the Free Marches, best friends Hawke and Anders return to Ferelden together. After Hawke becomes deathly ill in the treacherous Frostback Mountains, Anders finds a temporary shelter for them to stay in while she recovers from her illness. It is in that remote and desolate place that Anders discovers he is finally right where he belongs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Home At Last

Anders could barely make out the path through the blinding snow. The Frostback Mountains were formidable enough in the summer, but the harsh Ferelden winters made survival nearly impossible for anyone not accustomed to that environment. Melody contracted an illness a few days prior, which quickly evolved into a lung infection. Anders did his best to heal her, but if they didn't find shelter from the cold soon, neither of them would survive much longer.

Earlier that day, she blacked out, falling face first  in the snow, forcing Anders to carry her like a baby cradled in his arms. He had no idea where they were, but he hoped the path he found just before dusk would lead them to a village or, at the very least, the home of a benevolent family who might take pity on them.

He trudged up the narrow trail, holding Melody as close to his chest as he could to keep her as warm as possible. Her skin was so hot, it nearly burned where his bare hands touched her back. His feet were numb from the snow packed within his high leather boots, but he was determined to find shelter for them before he stopped again. Melody Hawke was his best friend, his only friend in fact, and he wasn't about to let her perish.

Just when he thought all hope was lost and he couldn't move another step if he tried, Anders spotted a small group of houses where the path began to widen. It was odd. With the frigid winter weather, he assumed there would be smoke billowing from the chimneys and lights in the windows, but the houses were all darkened, apparently long since abandoned. Anders assumed the homes were simply more skeletal remains of the Blight, a common sight in Ferelden, especially in mountainous regions where the darkspawn had easier access to the surface through their deep caverns.

For the sake of propriety, Anders pounded on the door of the closest house and called out for help. After several minutes of receiving no answer, he turned the handle and tried to push the door open, only to find it jammed. With every last ounce of strength he could muster, he kicked out his foot and forced the door to slam open. Once inside, he did a quick check through the house to ensure it was empty before laying Melody down on a brass bed near the fireplace.

After retrieving two quilts from a nearby chest, the healer gently removed his friend's wet clothes then wrapped the blankets around her like a cocoon. Once he ensured she was as warm and comfortable as possible, he added a few rotten logs and kindling from the woodbox to the hearth, then used magic to start a fire.

Anders settled down next to the unconscious rogue and brushed a tendril of auburn hair from her cheek before placing his right hand on her brow and his left just above her chest. It wasn't until he attempted to call his magic that he realized just how utterly exhausted he was. Between the long trek through the frigid mountains and carrying Melody for so long, he simply didn't possess the fortitude to work the spell he was attempting. Apparently, in his bid to find shelter for his best friend, he unwittingly utilized his own mana for strength. What he needed more than anything was rest to regenerate. He would never be able to help her if he didn't sleep.

The healer stared down at her for a long moment, contemplating what he should do. There was only one bed in the house, and although the fire removed some of the chill in the air, it was still freezing. Anders said a silent prayer to the Maker that Melody would understand and forgive him for what he was about to do as he removed his own clothes down to his smalls, laid down next to her, and pulled her in close. The heat radiating from her skin was almost unbearable, but he refused to let go in the hope that, if he could warm her enough, her fever would break.

Anders spent years dreaming of falling asleep with Melody lying naked in his arms, but at that moment, he would have given anything not to be there. He had loved Melody from afar since the night she went with him to the Chantry to rescue Karl, but he was never able to reveal those feelings out of fear for her safety. So, instead, they became close friends, which only made him love her more, but he didn't want take the chance of losing her friendship by revealing emotions he was certain she didn't share.

Watching her give her heart to that sanctimonious bastard Vael nearly killed him, but he kept his mouth shut. She was so happy the day she told him she and Sebastian planned to wed after he returned to Starkhaven and took back his throne that all he could do was give her a warm hug and hold back his tears until he got back to his clinic to cry in the privacy of his own home. Which is why it took the healer by complete surprise the day he destroyed the Chantry. Melody chose her friendship with him over her relationship with Sebastian by refusing to kill Anders in retaliation for Grand Cleric Elthina's death when her fiancée demanded it. She didn't argue with the man or try to make him see reason, she simply stood there, staring at him with a determined expression. After a long moment of awkward silence, Sebastian cursed her then vowed to return with his army to hunt down and kill them both.

Along their journey, Anders sensed how much losing Sebastian hurt her and tried to broach the subject once, but she refused to talk about it. The only answer the healer received was that she didn't regret the decision she made before she demanded him to drop it altogether. He often wondered in the following months as they ran for their lives whether or not she was being honest with him, but he never dared to ask.

He kissed the top of her head and tightened his arms around her shoulders before drifting off into a deep sleep. When he finally awoke, Anders was disappointed to learn that, although he was sweating like a roasting nug, Melody's fever remained unbroken. He shook her gently, but she didn't open her eyes, which told him her life was still in danger. With his mana at full strength, he didn't even bother to dress himself before placing his hands above her and murmuring a healing spell under his breath.

The healer put everything he had into that spell. He would have spent every last ounce of mana he possessed if he thought it would save her life, even if it meant giving his own. Just when he thought he was going to lose consciousness, he spied beads of perspiration forming at Melody's brow prompting a tear to spill down his cheek. Her fever was finally breaking. Although the infection was still present, it wasn't nearly as prevalent throughout her body as before. That fire, that abandoned house, just may have saved her life.

At that point, Anders was confident enough in her recovery that he allowed himself a few hours more sleep so he could regenerate more mana. Just as before, the moment he woke, he began reciting the healing spell again. He continued that cycle until the afternoon of the third day, when he was awoken by an insistent shaking of his shoulder.

"Anders," Melody whispered in his ear. "Anders…wake up."

He opened his eyes to the most glorious sight he had ever witnessed. Melody was finally awake, and her skin actually felt cool against his own. He beamed at the woman lying next to him as he rolled over onto his side. Tears of relief filled his eyes when he cupped her chin lowered his lips to her forehead.

"Thank the Maker" he whispered before pulling her to his chest in a tight embrace.

"Should I even ask why we're in bed together, me naked and you in your smalls? Or is the answer going to get you severely hurt?" she asked with her token arched brow.

"Yes, because I make it a habit to take advantage of unconscious women who are on death's doorstep." He flashed a crooked smile. "Besides, if you had a looking glass right now, you'd know my standards are way too high for the likes of you in your present state."

She scowled sardonically. "Thanks a lot, Anders. Way to kick a girl when she's down. You wouldn't exactly win any beauty contests at the moment yourself, you know." She scratched at the two week old beard growing on his cheek. "When's the last time you shaved anyway?"

"You don't like it? I thought it made me look rather dashing."

She nodded with a smirk. "Yes, maybe if you were a dwarf. I personally think you're a little tall for anyone to believe _that_."

Anders wrinkled his nose. "Very funny. So how are you feeling?"

"A bit stiff, actually," she replied "And dirty…and sweaty…and absolutely starving. I feel as if I hadn't eaten in days. How long was I out anyway?"

"Nearly four days."

"Four days?" she asked with disbelief. "I guess it's no wonder I feel like I could eat a side of beef by myself." She took in the room around her. "Where are we anyway?"

Anders shook his head. "I honestly have no idea. After you lost consciousness, I carried you up a mountain trail I found. It was snowing so hard that I stopped at the first house I came to. It was empty, so I brought you in to get you warm. As near as I could tell though, it looks as if we're in a village that was abandoned during the Blight."

"I don't suppose you found any food here?" she questioned with a glimmer of tentative hope in her eyes.

"To be honest, I haven't actually looked. I was so worried about you that getting you better was the only thing on my mind."

"So you haven't eaten either?"

The healer shrugged. "No. I guess I wasn't thinking about it. But now that you mention it, I am rather famished myself." He placed a light kiss on the tip of her nose. "Give me a few minutes. I'll see what I can find."

He retrieved his trousers from the floor and pulled them on, then began a frantic search of the house for any usable food the previous owners may have left behind. Unfortunately, it was just as he had feared, there wasn't even a scrap to be found. He dug through his pack and retrieved the last two pieces of hardtack Melody purchased at the last village they stopped in. He offered them both to her.

"Here, it's not much, but at least it should help you get some of your strength back until we find something else."

She grabbed one piece. "We'll share. I'll take this one, and you eat that one."

Anders waggled his head as he dropped the second piece in her lap. "No. You need it more than I do."

"Anders, you have to eat."

He touched her cheek and smiled. "I'll be fine. It looks like the snow has let up enough for me to venture outside now. I'll go see if I can find anything in the village. Who knows? Maybe there are still people around nearby."

"Anders…" she protested.

He covered her lips with the tip of his index finger. "As your healer, I insist."

As he finished donning the rest of his clothes, Anders expected her to argue, but she surprised him by simply sighing and taking another bite of bread. Once he was completely dressed, he opened the door, allowing a blast of cold wind to sweep through the hovel and rattle the windows.

"I'll be back soon," he assured her before walking outside and shutting the cold out with him.

Anders quickly discovered he and Melody were, in fact, in an empty village, and it was much larger than he originally estimated. A wide path next to the house he and Melody occupied led uphill to more houses and a few shops. Up the hill from that area, he discovered the village Chantry. When he entered the house of worship, Anders realized he had been wrong about the whereabouts of the villagers. Bones of the dead littered the floor inside the Chantry, those inside slaughtered, their bodies left to rot. Anders had been a Grey Warden long enough to know those people weren't victims of a darkspawn attack. If it had been the spawn, the building would have been burned to the ground. Someone had entered that Chantry and killed everyone there down to the last man.

Then, it dawned on the healer. He remembered Oghren recounting the tale of how the Hero of Ferelden and her friends recovered the Urn of Sacred Ashes from a temple near a hidden village in the Frostback Mountains. Oghren told him that they had to kill everyone in the village to defend themselves. Even the children, some barely old enough to hold a weapon, were armed and attacking them. When Anders asked the commander about the events, the only thing she would say on the subject was that, although she was happy they found Andraste's ashes to save Arl Eamon, it was the one mission of her journey that would haunt her for the remainder of her life.

After a long search of all the buildings in the village, the closest thing Anders found to food was an old fishing rod with a handcrafted lure attached to its line. Darkness was beginning to settle over the mountains, and he knew Melody would need more than a couple of pieces of tack bread to sustain her. He grabbed the rod and headed for the dock he spotted upon leaving the hovel and used magic to burn a hole in the thick sheet of ice formed over the small mountain lake. He only prayed he could manage to catch enough for both of them to have supper that evening.

When he finally opened the door to the small shack, half frozen and so hungry he thought he would faint, Anders found Melody wrapped in a blanket, rocking back and forth in front of a roaring fire. The cold breeze coming in through the opening ruffled her hair prompting her to turn her head. In that moment, Anders' growling stomach was the last thing on his mind as the sight of her relieved smile took his breath away.

Although he fought to keep his feelings for her under control, it was a battle he knew he could never win, especially since they fled the Vinmark Mountains together. The others had all departed one by one soon after the battle with the templars until Anders and Hawke were finally left alone. It was then they decided to go back to Ferelden in the hopes they might be able to eke out a life along the border of the Kocari Wilds where Melody knew the templars feared to venture. She told him it would be rough going, but between his magic and her fighting skills, they might just make it.

"I was worried that something might have happened to you," she scolded. "I was just giving myself a few more minutes to warm up, then I was going to go looking for you."

Anders tossed a short rope with several small fish attached onto the nearby table. "I didn't mean to worry you. I checked the entire village, but there wasn't a scrap of food to be found so I decided to catch some."

Melody chuckled as she rose to her feet and dusted off the legs of her dark wool trousers. "You never cease to surprise me, Anders. I had no idea that you knew how to fish."

The blonde man pulled a small dagger from his belt, grabbed one of the fish from the line and began stripping its scales. "Well, you remember that I wasn't sent to the Circle until I was twelve. Before that, my father took me fishing quite often when I was growing up. It was a good thing too because it was a skill that served me well all those times I ran away from that Maker forsaken place."

Melody grabbed a dagger from her own belt and began scaling a second fish. When Anders appeared surprised by her actions, she shrugged. "What? You think you're the only one whose father ever took him fishing? In fact, it was the only time my father ever spent with Carver and me. Once a week, we would get up very early in the morning, before the sun even rose, and head to the lake with our fishing poles. It didn't matter how many fish we caught, either. We could've caught a hundred and Carver and I would both insist on staying until it was nearly too dark to find our way back home."

"So your sister never went with you?"

"Only once, when she was about six. She said it was boring and smelly and refused to go anymore, which was fine by Carver and me. With Bethany being the only other mage in the family, my father spent most of his time training her. Over the years, Carver became very bitter about that fact and when he was fourteen, he stopped going with us too."

"And you never did? Become bitter, I mean."

Melody waggled her head, her auburn ponytail swishing back and forth. "No, I was never bitter about it…a little jealous at times, but not bitter. I guess I always understood more than Carver did that Bethany needed a lot more of our father's time because he was the only one who was able to train her. I have to admit, though, that I found myself wishing I'd been born with magic a few times over the years. That was before I went to Kirkwall. After seeing how badly mages were treated first hand, I quickly learned how blessed I was not to have inherited my father's gift." She peered up at Anders with bright green eyes. "You know…you remind me of him in a lot of ways…my father I mean."

Anders smiled. "Your sister told me that once, not too long after I met the both of you. I'm sorry the two of you had to part company again so soon after the battle. I'm sure you miss her terribly."

She nodded. "I do…but I don't think she's quite forgiven me yet for forcing her to join the Wardens."

"I'm sorry about that."

"Anders, you did nothing to be sorry for. If you hadn't been there, Bethany would've died in that pit. Even if she never forgives me, I would rather her hate me than for her to be dead."

Silence fell between them as they continued to clean the scales from the fish. After a few moments,mAnders noticed Melody chewing her lower lip in thought. "Is something wrong?" he asked

"I was just wondering," she began. "Why didn't you and Bethany ever…you know…get together? I know she liked you a great deal and the two of you had so much in common."

Anders feigned surprise. "Me and Bethany? I guess I never thought of it. I had no idea she had those types of feelings toward me."

The words he spoke were a bald-faced lie that he hoped Melody wouldn't see right through. He would have had to been blind not to notice her younger sister's starry-eyed flirting, blind or a complete idiot. But that hadn't been the worst of it. About a week before they set off on the Deep Roads expedition, Bethany showed up at his clinic late one night. She had imbibed in a little too much wine earlier in the evening and threw herself at him, begging him to be her first lover. Anders tried to let her down as gently as possible, but she took off into the night weeping like a small girl just the same. The truth was, he could have never had those types of feelings for Bethany because he was already in love with her older sister. He didn't tell Bethany that, of course. He didn't want it to come between her and Melody, but Bethany wasn't stupid. She guessed the reason for his denial of her offer right away. Anders tried to console her. He even tried denying his love for Melody, but, in the end, it did no good.

After that, Bethany wouldn't even glance in his direction again. He often wondered if she blamed him more than Melody for her being sent away to the Wardens. Even when she returned to aid them in the final battle, she still refused to speak to him or acknowledge his presence.

Melody glowered at Anders suspiciously, but whatever she was thinking, she kept to herself. She wiped her forearm across the bridge of her nose, leaving several scales clinging to her nose and cheek. Anders had to clench his teeth over his lips to keep from laughing.

"What?" she asked.

He shook his head with an uneven smirk. "Nothing."

Her brow creased as she glanced into a cracked mirror hanging on the nearby wall. Her lids narrowed as she glared at him. "Oh very funny. You could have told me, you know."

"But you look so cute covered in scales. I figured you were trying to disguise yourself as a mermaid."

Melody put down her knife and picked up a large pile of scales before flashing a wry smile at Anders. "I think that beard of yours could use a little color."

"You wouldn't dare," he challenged.

She nodded with a chuckle. "Oh…I would."

Before the mage could get away, Melody jumped across the table and smeared the contents in her hand all over his face. When she stood back and placed her hands on her hips, he shook his head to get as many of the scales from his face as possible. He then grabbed a handful of his own and grinned, a mischievous twinkle glimmering in his amber eyes.

"You are in so much trouble now," he warned.

She laughed. "Only if you can catch me magic man!"

The rogue took off at a run toward the door, but her illness slowed her down enough to allow Anders to catch her by the waist as she reached for the door. She spun around just as he went to cover her face with fish scales and ended up with them smushed into the back of her head. She stared at her friend in surprise for several moments before they both burst into laughter.

Fortunately, they were able to locate some old clothes in a wardrobe in the corner, and Anders used his magic to melt and heat some snow in a basin they found. Once she was clean of the fish scales, Melody told Anders to take his turn at the basin while she cooked the fish he caught. After a few very unsuccessful attempts at removing the scales from his scraggly beard, the healer realized the only way he was ever going to be able to get rid of them all was to shave his face clean. By the time he was finished, not even a hint of stubble remained on his face and he felt more human than he had in weeks.

When he approached Melody at the fire, she peered up at him and gave a low whistle of approval. "I must admit, you clean up pretty well. Almost handsome, I'd say."

"Thanks a lot," he scowled.

She rolled her eyes. "You know I'm only teasing. Anyway, I think this fish is done if you're ready to eat."

Anders rubbed a hand across his abdomen. "I was about to suggest you take it off the fire, whether it was ready or not. I don't know about you, but I'm bloody starving."

Melody used her newly scrubbed dagger to push two fish off the spit onto a wooden plate and handed it to him before making a plate for herself. Neither spoke a word as they wolfed down their first helping. When he finished, Melody didn't bother asking before dishing out two more fish for each of them. When they were both completely sated, Anders helped his friend clean up the mess then they sat down next to each other in front of the fireplace.

"I don't know about you," she smiled as she patted her stomach. "But that just might be the best bloody meal I've ever eaten."

Anders chuckled. "It was definitely the best either of us have had in a good long while, I'd wager."

The healer noticed Melody shiver as she folded her arms over her chest. In response, he retrieved the thickest quilt he could find from atop the bed and draped it over her shoulders before taking his place beside her again. After a few moments she scooted her bottom over until her shoulder was pressed into his.

"You know, this blanket is big enough for the both of us to share."

Anders arched a brow. "Are you sure?"

She nodded as she threw one side of the quilt over his left shoulder and pulled his other arm over her right bicep. "Of course. Besides we can generate more heat this way."

Anders' heart quickened its pace when she nuzzled her face into his chest. His breath hitched in his throat, and it took several minutes of trying to calm himself before he could even speak.

"Hawke?" he finally asked.

"Hmm?"

"I realize that I probably shouldn't question it…but why did you take my side over Sebastian's?"

She snuggled up even closer to him. "Because it was the right thing to do…and because I saw something in Sebastian's eyes that day that I'd never noticed before."

"What was that?"

"A terrible light of vengeance that even Justice could never hope to obtain. It scared me. Don't get me wrong, I could have never killed you, Anders…but that…thing inside Sebastian, it caused me to not even try to reason with him."

"And why did you choose not to leave with one of the others? Why did you stay with me? You probably could've found a way to be forgiven for what happened. After all, it wasn't you that started it. Why throw your life away like that?"

He felt her head waggle against him. "I could never abandon you Anders. I had many friends in Kirkwall, but you…you are the best friend I've ever had."

He squeezed her shoulders. "Thank you…for everything."

She peered up at him and slid her hand up his chest until it rested on his cheek. "There's something else."

Anders brow creased as he stared into her green eyes, wishing with everything within in him that she would say the words written on his own heart. "What's that?"

She chewed at her lower lip, the way she always did when she was trying to find the exact words she wanted to say. "There's something I've wanted to tell you for a very long time, but I was afraid to say it."

His heart thundered like a herd of wild stallions. "You know you can tell me anything, Hawke."

"Melody," she whispered.

"What?"

"Please…call me Melody. We've been friends for seven years, and you've never once called me by my given name."

"Okay…Melody," he gulped. "I…I just never thought you wanted me to."

"You never asked."

His entire body began to tremble. "So, is that what you wanted to tell me?"

"No."

She pulled away from him, leaving his arms feeling emptier than they had ever felt before. As she stared into the flames within the hearth, she began fiddling with a small twig that she dropped while feeding kindling to the fire earlier. Her chest rose and fell heavily with a long, slow, sigh.

"There's something I need to tell you that I've been holding back from saying for years, but I just can't keep it in any longer." She released another protracted sigh, and Anders swore his heart was about to pound out of his chest. "At first, I didn't say anything because of the way Bethany felt about you. I just couldn't hurt her that way. I also figured that since you were both mages you'd be better suited for each other." He swallowed past a huge lump in his throat. Could it really be? Was she really saying what he thought she was saying? "Then," she continued. "After she was gone…you and I had become such good friends that I didn't want to ruin what we had. I guess I was afraid you might reject me. I mean…If you had rejected me, how would I have been able to face you again after telling you something like that?" She finally turned to look at him, her green eyes swimming with worried tears. "After telling you that I'm in love with you Anders. I have been from the very beginning."

Anders moved up next to her and took her face in his hands. He caressed her cheeks with his thumbs, his amber eyes desperately searching her green ones. "Hawke…Melody…For the past seven years I have lain awake every night aching for you…longing to tell you how very much I love you."

She waggled her head in bewilderment. "But why didn't you ever say anything?"

"At first, I feared for your safety. Justice hadn't been a part of me for very long at that point, and I wasn't sure what would happen. Then, after years of wrestling with those feelings, I'd finally made the decision to just tell you. I went to your estate that evening to let you know, but you told me that you had decided to pursue a relationship with Sebastian. With everything that I am…I just assumed it was the Maker's way of telling me it wasn't meant to be. So I kept it to myself, but I never stopped loving you, Melody…not even for a moment in all those years."

He lowered his face to hers, their lips finally touching for the first time. That kiss was better than anything Anders could have ever imagined. It was then that he realized, for the first time since he was a child, he felt at home. For the first time in his life, he felt completely at peace. Melody loved him. Nothing else mattered, and he would spend the remainder of his life proving to her that her faith in him wasn't in vain.


End file.
